Chapter 18 - CLAIRE IS ANGRY WITH ME
Claire waited until her blood pressure stabilized before we had the fight.
Maybe intentional.
Maybe survival.
Noah slept in the bassinet.
She sat across from me at the kitchen table.
"You keep saying your mother did this."
"She did."
"You keep saying she lied using your name."
"She did."
"You keep saying you didn’t know."
"I didn’t."
Then:
"You didn’t want to know."
I went still.
She continued.
"When I said your mother was controlling feeding, you said she was helping."
"I remember."
"When I said she canceled the car, you said I should use the driver later."
"Yes."
"When I told you she hated my medication, you said ignore her."
"Yes."
"When I said she was keeping notes, you laughed."
I had.
"She likes lists."
That was what I said.
Claire’s eyes filled.
"You outsourced noticing."
That sentence hurt more than accusation.
Because it was accurate.
I worked.
Earned.
Provided.
Hired.
Secured.
Solved.
And believed those verbs were substitutes for paying attention.
I said:
"I’m sorry."
Claire shook her head.
"Don’t say it once."
"What?"
May you like
"Change things."
Fair.
