Chapter 6 - My Slap
The district attorney offered diversion.
Misdemeanor battery.
No prior record.
Agatha had redness, no lasting injury.
Video corroborated.
I accepted.
Terms:
Twelve-week anger-management course.
Twenty-five hours community service.
No unlawful contact.
Restitution if medical expenses—none.
Dismissal after completion.
Some friends said:
“You were protecting your son.”
I corrected.
“I hit her after she hit him.”
“That is protection.”
“No. Benson was already on the floor and I could have moved him away.”
The difference mattered.
I had punished.
Not protected.
Dr. Morris helped me explain to Benson.
“Mommy hit Grandma.”
“Yes.”
“Because Grandma hit me.”
“I was very angry because Grandma hit you.”
“So okay?”
“No.”
He frowned.
“Why people do no okay?”
Excellent question.
“Because knowing what is right doesn’t make us perfect at doing it.”
He considered.
“Daddy no dinner no okay?”
“Yes.”
“Grandma slap no okay?”
“Yes.”
“Mommy slap no okay?”
“Yes.”
“Benson crying?”
“Okay.”
He smiled.
“Good.”
The hierarchy was strange but healthy.
Then my anger course.
One exercise:
Trigger.
Thought.
Action.
My trigger:
Benson being struck.
Thought:
She needs to feel what she did.
Action:
Slap.
Outcome:
More fear.
Same logic as Agatha:
He needs to feel consequence.
Food removed.
We used different scale.
Same dangerous impulse.
May you like
I hated that.
Good.
