Chapter 17 - JOSEPHINE AND GIFTS
Josephine became suspicious of presents.
That lasted longer than I expected.
At five, she asked:
“Do I owe you for this?” after I bought new shoes.
“No.”
“What about birthday?”
“No.”
“What if expensive?”
“No.”
“What if I don’t like it?”
“You can still say thank you for the thought and not pretend it’s your favorite.”
That became important.
Robert’s family had turned gratitude into obedience.
I almost overcorrected.
One birthday Josephine refused to thank a classmate for a gift because:
“Daddy says I don’t have to like presents.”
I laughed.
Then explained:
“You don’t have to like the object. You should still be kind when someone gives sincerely.”
Context.
Always.
Dr. Lila Chen helped her separate:
Gift.
Bribe.
Obligation.
Manipulation.
Ordinary generosity.
At seven, Josephine received a secondhand bicycle from my neighbor.
She asked:
“Was this trash?”
The neighbor said:
“My daughter outgrew it.”
Josephine looked at me.
“Can old things be gifts?”
“Yes.”
That question mattered.
The problem had never been that the horse was used.
The problem was intention.
A beloved hand-me-down could carry dignity.
A brand-new diamond could carry contempt.
May you like
Objects were not the moral category.
People were.
